why did i choose me as the main character if it makes me so awkward? ♡
I think the reason may be that I've never read about a character I could fully relate to, not only appearance wise, but truly feelings wise. It always bothered me that issues like self-esteem and fear of abandonment and fear of trusting someone and anything like that, were so easily delt with and the authors made the character get over it so fast, without struggle, without any of the real healing process and difficulties to get there. Another reason would be that, in other books I read where the main character is chubby/fat, it is rather romanticized and doesn't mention the depth of the suffering that goes with growing up fat. I never see authors write about what it's like being fat, even when they represent fat people in their art. So I decided to do it. Being fat isn't just a trope in a romance book. It's trauma and growing up hating yourself. It's not your mother calling you names and the love interest hearing it and reassuring you. It's being f...